William the Conqueror?

Poor Will Grundy - well I know he's got £120,000 from some Scottish Aunt, but he's also got Nic 'the gold digging/con-artist' Hanson as his live in lover, and the abiding hatred of his brother, Ed, ex-wife Emma, and former friends Roy Tucker & pregnant girlfriend Hayley. Nic seems to be constantly on the verge of battering George, Will's son, and really can't deal with village life. She's also determined to get her hands on Will's money and certainly isn't keen on some of it going to George. He's just gazumped Roy & Hayley over the house that Emma used to live in - and who will he be renting it out to - whilst leaving Nic stuck in some tiny tied cottage in the woods? Will really knows how to win friends and influence people!

Strange Couples

Now the family relationships in Ambridge are always slightly complicated, but the announcement that Heather (Ruth's mother) and Jim (the Prof) are to meet up means potentially that David's mother-in-law could also turn out to be his sister Shula's mother-in-law too. Now how does that make them related exactly? Whilst we're on the subject of Heather - what time era is she in precisely? Do people from the North East really talk about children as 'bairns' or is this just another example of Archers tweeness - I do find it so irritating. Of course I have to have the sick bucket close to hand all the time whilst listening to this everday story while Ruth goes through the trauma of her operation. I do find the constant loveydoveyness nauseating when we recall how recently she was having interesting liaisons in the cowshed with herdsman Sam. But then her mother also tried to alienate the affections of Phil not that long ago.

Whilst considering bizarre couplings can someone explain to me why Matt & Brian are so devastatingly attractive to women? Is it power and money that does it? Brian in particular is very unsavoury, and is currently trying to snatch away the inheritance for Adam & Debbie in favour of his lovechild. Ah well it isn't real life!